Crystal Crush
by master of gray
Summary: The trial is over and it didn't end the way the Magic High Commission had expected. So now their all in a pub trying to forget when Hekapoo remembers Rhombulus's crush on Queen Moon and wonders if there has been any other secret affair with the man of the High Commission and the Queen's of Mewni.


**Crystal Crush**

The bar-maid had just left for the second and time that night holding her serving platter closes to her apron tied mid-rift. Leaving the picnic style table and it's occupites behind. Sitting all on one row together sipping on their beer and a bowl of baked salty pig skins were the Magic High Commission. From the right end to the left was Hekapoo, Omnitraxus Prime, a famed picture of Lekmet with black satin ribbons tied on it, and finely Rhombulus.

The trial had gone poorly to say the least. With the truth that the Butterfly family was more commoner then royal coming out from under fire of the truth or punishment box. Now the commission sat in a local pub drowning them-selves in beer and using the dim-lighting and rowdy sitting to sober their mood.

Chewing away on pig skins Hekapoo gave a sigh just as Rhombulus took a long gulp from his stein. Bringing it back down to rest on the table he made a down cast look with his single eye before speaking in an emotional low voice. "Do you think we will be kicked out of the Magic High Commission?"

Without looking from the wooden bowl only half-full Hekapoo thinly responded. "No, no I don't think so. I mine we founded the high commission and are the oldest living members." She replied, reaching her hand into the crispy snacks in front of her. "No I don't think they're going to fire us. Now never trust us again, now that's more likely."

Taking a deep sigh Omnitraxus fallowed her statement with one of his own. "Yeah, am with Hekapoo. I don't believe we will be chased out of Mewni. They still need us too much. But I'm pretty sure we've lost all sway as high council from now on." The crystal orb said as he used his magic to down more than half the contacts of his glass beer mug in one gasp letting out a satisfied breath afterwards. "We have a lot of work lied out before us."

"That's the truth." Hekapoo add. "Not to mention all the paper work and time we're going to have to do to find Eclipsa's long last biological child with Globgor."

Omnitraxus swirled around in his set in a gesture that looked a lot like he was losing the muscles in his neck before settling down and venting his frustrations on the matter. "Don't forget about Star. That little cockroach won't let us hear the end of it. She'll tail the whole kingdom about the matter without thinking about all the different ways it could do damage."

"Yeah, I know what you mine. I don't hate the kid but she can get on my nerves." Hekapoo added flatly.

Feeling far more sadder than the others the crystal maker gave a huff. "Thank God poor Lekmet isn't here to see this." Rhombulus replied solemnly about his dead friend. "And Queen Moon, how are we ever going to face her again? She trusted us."

Just as she was chiseling on one end of a pork rind Hekapoo's mind light up with a recollection. Dropping her arms to the table edge and looking around her friends to the one that sat at the end she spoke out in a high shocked voice.

"Just to be on the right page, do you really have a crush on Queen Moon and how long have you had it?" The fire user questioned. Rhombulus's shoulder's jolted at the sudden out of the blue inquiry and his single crystal cased eye darted back and forth nervously. Omnitraxus's curiosity also peaked at the mention of Rhombulus's fancy for Moon and he looked over to his friend just like Hekapoo was doing waiting for an answer.

Feeling the pressure from his peers Rhombulus bashfully answered. "Yes, I have a crush on Queen Moon and I've had for a really long time now."

"Really." Omnitraxus said still a little surprised about Rhombulus' s feeling towards the queen.

"Will, how long have you had a crush on her?" Hekapoo snapped expecting more of an answer then that. "Wait she became Queen when she was a kid. Have you had romantic and interests in her since then?"

Both Omnitraxus Prime and Hekapoo looked at Rhombulus in shock at the possible implications of his feelings.

"What! You guys think I'm some low life pervert?" Rhombulus shouted a little too loud waving his snake hands in front of him as the two another members of commission stared blankly at him. "The truth is I've had a thing for Queen Moon since three years before she got married. So there you happy now?" He said in a huff of annoying crossing his arms across his chest.

Still at a blank for words Omnitraxus was the first to respond. "So all this time you've had feeling for Moon and you didn't tail her, or us, why?"

Looking at his friends more open heartedly Rhombulus answered. "Will Queen Moon was in love with King River that's one reason and I was a member of the Magic High Commission was another. Besides it's not like it's my first crush or anything."

For a minute it looked like they would go back to quietly drinking beer and eating chips when Hekapoo looked back to her work mates and asked in a and acuseing way. "Wait you said not your first crush. Do you mean on another Queen? Have any of you two had a crush on any of the other Queens of Mewni before?"

Both Omnitraxus and Rhombulus looked like deer caught in the headlights as they made quick eye contact before looking back at their steins.

"Wall I'm waiting." Hekapoo demanded. Impatiens getting the better of her.

Rhombulus took a deep breath before looking in Hekapoo's direction and Omnitraxus swirled around, both themselves for their friend's unpredictable reaction.

With a deep breath both answered simultaneously. "Yes."

Hekapoo was flabbergasted as she stared at the pair wide eyed and opened mouth. The two in question just bused themselves with the beer in their mugs and the dried cracks on the wooden table.

The very thought of members of the magic high commission having romantic feeling for the royalty was more than scandalous, it was absurd. All the members of the committee were hundreds of years old, and would continue to live hundreds of years. The times table was way off for a romantic relationship, it would never work out. And besides she'd know these guys since the high commission had began. When had any of them had crushes on any of the Queens?

"Wait, wait…" The fire user repeated as she attempted to get everything she wanted to say lined up right in her head before she let it out. She finely decided just to simplify it.

"Who?.."

Both of the magical boys stared wide eyed as Hekapoo began going down the list of queens beginning with the start of Mewni history.

"Was it Urania the First One or her daughter Solena the Smitten."… Hekapoo asked giving her two friends a deadpanned look. "What about Estelaria the First Star or…"

"We never know any of those Queens." Rhombulus suddenly cut in. "They all were ruling before we know Mewni existed."

Hekapoo's eyebrows knitted in confusion as she tried to remember the Butterfly family history. "But what about Hemera the Builder, she was the first queen to be part of the magic high commission…" She was cut off fast be Omnitraxus. "Yes, but we weren't, none of us where a part of the magic high commission till decades later. We also never mat Polaria the Navigator, the oldest child of Cosmica the Explorer."

Hekapoo thought for a moment before speaking. "But you and I both know Cosmica. You and I were already part of the high council by then, you even mentioned knowing Cosmica before joining the high commission. You…"

Hekapoo was cut off again by Omnitraxus. "Your right I did meet her before joining the high commission but it was only once and she was still a little girl then. It was when she was hopping around from dimension to dimension looking for adventure and she took little interest in a crystal ball with a skull in it. Besides she was always with her future husband Pyxar. Those two were as close as twine and if am not forgetting wasn't you who mat her first. When she was earning her Dimensional scissors."

Face-palming herself just as it all clicked. Hekapoo had been the first to meet Commica when she wanted a pair of scissors to see the universe with and after finely getting them the future queen was almost never seen without her future king. But that still didn't answer the question she had asked.

"Omnitraxus plan and simple did you have a crush on her?"

The crystal orb looked annoyed at her but answered any way.

"No."

For a moment Hekapoo looked placid as if satisfied with the answer, then she spoke.

"Did you ever fantasize about being in King Pyxar's place during the wedding night?"

If Omnitraxus had, had any beer in his mouth he would have spat it out in shock at the secret implications of the question. "No! I don't fantasize about being in the Pyzar's place during his first night as king." Omnitraxus snapped in embarrassment.

"Why? What about the wedding night?" Rhombulus asked innocently.

"Nothing" Omnitraxus hissed but Hekapoo answered right after him. "Queen Commica was a virgin on her wedding night."

The red under Rhombulus's eye was nearly ruby. Too add to the color his snake hands were also neon red.

"Why would you say something like that out loud?" Rhombulus's right snake hand said.

An insulted look come over Hekapoo's face at the question. "I don't see what the fuss is about. Everyone was one at one time. And all her close family and friends knew. Besides…" She trailed off for a moment to sip her drink. "Isn't every guys dream to deflower a virgin or something?"

Both boys cast her hard embarrassed looks just before Rhombulus spoke. "Now that is not a universal concept. Not every man dreams of being a girl's first." The crystal maker said matter of factly. "So I don't know what kinda ego guy stuff you've been hearing or watching but I can tale you right now that none of it is true or all that."

Helapoo cocked an eyebrow at Rhombulus's speech half believing him and half not about the realty of men's fantasies. But just as she was opening her mouth to investigate more on Rhombulus statement Omnitraxus beat her to the opening.

"Ok, ok enough about maiden bed sheets." Omnitraxus said in a warm huff. "Don't forget what happened the morning after." The orb reminded his friends.

Hekapoo and Rhombulus both took long looks at their steins at the reminder of what happened the next day and their debate on the truth about what guys acutely fantasies about was forgetting.

The fire user looked up a little bit meek but still determined and continued with her inquiry. "Wall what about Crescenta the Eager or her older sister Dirhhennia? She was queen for a short while."

The past conversation had felt like it had opened some closet doors, weather not it had was debatable but it felt like it had and neither of them felt as put off or guarded as post-queen talk, so both answered. "Neither."

Hekapoo kept going. "What about Febe the Red One?"

Omnitraxus replied right away with a no. But Rhombulus took a moment. Both looked in his direction waiting for an answer. "Wall if we're all telling secrets then." Rhombulus said bashful robbing the back of his crystal head. "Then wall I didn't have a thing for her, but Lekmet did."

Hekapoo and Omnitraxus eyes blow open and they stared in surprises from Rhombulus to the picture of Lekmet sitting in between them. The news that their dearly departed friend had, had a royal fancy had token them by surprise. They had totally forgotten him in this conversation considering his current absence from the world. But at one time, for the longest time he had been a part of the high commission and had been a part of the lives of many of its monarchs.

"So you're telling me that Lekmet, our Lekmet the monk, zen old goat-man was sweet on a queen hundreds of years ago." Hekapoo said.

Omnitraxus didn't want to deny the way Rhombulus know his friend but even he found it just a little unbelievably. "When did any of this take please?"

"Wall…" Rhombulus started. "First of all this was centuries ago when Lekmet was a younger man, or un, goat-man that is. And they met at a council meeting and while they hit it off. You know Febe was beautiful. That pretty red her and eyes and Lekmet wasn't too bad looking for a bat-goat thing. I think what really won him over was that Febe was the only other parson next to me that could understand what he was saying."

The two others looked on in interest at their work mate's tale before speaking. "So he had a crush on Queen Febe." started Hekapoo.

Shaking his head Rhombulus curated. "No I think they were in love."

Both Omnitraxus and Hekapoo's mouths dropped. "So he had romantic feelings for her." Asked the glass orb.

"That's the energy I always got from it." Rhombulu facted.

"Was it sexual?" Hekapoo asked without hesitation to discreetly.

Rhombulus once more blushed at her invasiveness. "I don't know. You know we did have our own lives apart. He didn't tell me everything and I for one didn't ask. I don't know if his relationship with the queen was romantic, platonic or if they were having an affair or what. I didn't know anything about that. I just know they really cared about each and that's it."

The group looked forward off the topic of their dead friend's love life when Hekapoo picked up the queen crush talk again. "What about Festivia the Fun?"

"No." They both said together. "But I did like her fun ways." said Omnitraxus. "She was always trying to make Mewni a happier please to live."

"Yeah…" Rhombulus began adding. "And she made brand new ways to make wine and beer. Do you guys remember some of those drinking parties we'd attend with the Queen? We'd bait to see who could hold their liquor the longest."

"Speaking of wine where is that bar-maid, I'd like a refill." And as they waited for the bar-maid to appear so they could flag her down Hekapoo kept going. "How about Asteria the Mother of the Stars."

"We all loved her Hekapoo it just wasn't romantic." Omnitraxus said.

"How about Etheria the Knight? Don't tell me that none of you didn't have feeling for her, he poor thing was the first queen in Mewni history to be focused in to an arranged marriage with someone she didn't love. So don't tell me you two didn't feel a smidge guilty and try to comfort her with the affection she would never know otherwise. I know that's another tape of man fantasy."

"No" Omnitraxus said.

"Me neither. Although I did really admire the warrior she was. She was an incredible Knight." Rhombulus said. "And coming from an romantic such as myself, you're not wrong about the about this guy fantasies, but You and I both know from being big romances readers that realty and fiction don't go mix."

Hekapoo knitted her brows but continued on with her questions.

"OK, how about Skywynne Queen of Hours?"

Both answered. "No"

"What about Soupina the Strange?"

Both answered. "No"

"And Galaxia the Clairvoyant?"

Both answered. "No'

"Don't tell me you two didn't harbor feeling for Venus the Fairest."

Both her companions turned bright red as they played with their drinks.

"You guys did." Hekapoo said in both surprise and shock.

Omnitraxus looked up in disbelief at Hekapoo surprise. "Of curses we did. I mean this is Queen Venus you're talking about, who didn't want that woman. She was the most beautiful woman in all of Mewni."

Rhombulus added his own as wall. "Yeah, I mean who didn't pine for her, when you think about it."

A small surge of irritation zipped thought her at the high praises of this former queen and the sudden openness about her friends sex lives. "What did you two find most attractive about her?"

They both thought for a moment. There was so much about Venus that was hard not to be attracted to. But they choose what stuck with them the most.

"That face."

"That hair."

"Those breasts!" Everyone at the table looked down at Rhombulus's snake hands that ware turning red. They both looked like deer caught in the headlights till the right one spoke. "What we're a part of this conversation too." Omnitraxus gave them this look of annoyance before he spoke. "Really, and pray tell how you and your other would be able to please Queen Venus or take part in her art?"

"We've got mouths and tongues doofus, do the math." The left one said sarcastically.

"I bate she tastes like all the colors of the rainbow." Said the right dreamily.

"So did you two have a relationship with her?" Hekapoo asked eager in her voice.

"No"… Omnitraxus replied. "Just like Rhombulus said, fantasies about a relationship and actually having a relationship are too different things. And neither Rhombulus or I wanted to be another one of Venus's conquests. Do you remember the many she had?"

"Yeah"… Rhombulus started. "I'd like to remember her as the affectionate child she used to be instead of the adult with all those troubles she became."

Hekapoo pressed her lips together at their confession, not sure whether to feel excited or put off, but ether way she continued down the list.

"Helia, The Light of Power?"

"No"

"Celestia, The Queen of Winter or Meteora the Relentless?"

Both shook their heads.

"Didn't you say you loved her wardrobe, Hekapoo. Celestia. It was very oriental and you loved her many fur coats."

The fire user nodded. "That's true. I loved her choices in clothing style. And I thing I heard her say that all fur coat, blanks, and fur lined cloths where all made out of artificial hair. She didn't mind eating animals but she didn't like wearing them."

"What about Hekatia, the Necromancer?"

"Really!" They both said at once at the mention of the long dead sorceress.

She had been an obvious no but Hekapoo wanted to be as thorough anyway. "What about"… She stopped for what she was saying to think on it first before continuing. "What about Eclipsa, Queen of Darkness?"

Both Omnitraxus and Rhombulus looked at Hekapoo with an expression that screamed blasphemy. Even Rhombulus's snake hands were so surprised that they choke on the beer they were drinking from their owner's mug.

"Hekapoo we just all saw her five hours ago in court where he, Queen Moon, and Moon's daughter Star outdid one of the council's biggest kept secrets. Why in the world would you bring up her name as a suggestion?" Omnitraxus barked.

Hekapoo shrugged her shoulder's at that. "I don't know. I mean she was different three hundred years ago and she did have tastes in monsters…"

"We're not monsters." They both said at once.

"No, but you two are not in the norm and for a member of the Butterfly family nether was her and besides she was kinda pretty in a china doll kind of way she loved to hear jokes and put roses in all the rooms in the castle that where being used and give them out as gifts to others."

"Now you make her sound like she wasn't half bad…" The crystal maker said. "Maybe you should have been on Star's side."

"Hey, I stand by my opinion that she's evil." Hekapoo snapped.

"OK, what About Luna the Child?"

Rhombulus and Omnitraxus gave Hekapoo a sympathetic looks at who she just named. Luna was definitely not a possibility. She had inherited the wand and the crown when she was only eight years old. And for the rest of her life she had always been so sad.

Rhombulus spoke for a moment. "Hadn't her wand turned into a baby rattle? Or something like that causes she was so young."

"Yes, yes"… Omnitraxus answered with a sadness in his voice. "Something a lot like that. She was after all a baby herself."

Hekapoo thought about the next queen in line. "Heaven the Scared?" Still another no from them. "Will what about Vesper, The Morning Star. She the queen that ended the Mewni Dark Ages. She most of at least been one you're favorite rulers for all she did for the kingdom."

"You're right she was one of our favorite queens but we didn't have a crush on her." Omnitraxus answered.

"Solaria, the Monster Carver?"

It was Rhombulus's turn to answer for them. "It was like with Queen Etheria, she was cool and admiral but that doesn't always mine we had a crush on her. Just mild hero worship."

"Hesperia, the Singer of Dusk or Sideria, the Fortunate?"

"Not me."

"Me nether."

They both said, but paid high coplaments to the two queen's high accomplishments to the Mewni kingdom.

"What about Celena the Shy. They say she was as beautiful as Queen Venus was."

"She was beautiful Hekapoo we all remember that…" Said Omnitraxus. "But she was as timid as a rabbit; it almost seemed like a miracle or a shock that she was able to find someone to get closes to with."

"Diana then, Diana The huntress?"

Rhombulus and Omnitraxus thought back to her. She had passed only lass then a century ago. She had definitely been a nice lady and queen but there had always been something they couldn't quite put their finger on about her. Like she could see right throw them and know everything they did. She would once a week go off into the forest alone. She claimed to hunt but some feared she gone down the same path as Queen Eclipsa and had token a monster lover as her affair. But no one was ever sure. Both of the men shook their heads in a no.

The branches on the Butterfly tree were growing thin. Seeing as she only had three queens left. "What about Sky the Weaver or her sister Queen Comet?"

A long deep sigh left Omnitraxus when he heard those names. "Is it really been that long? It seemed just like yesterday they were both alive. I can't believe it's been that long."

Both Hekapoo and Rhombulus felt a wave of sadness pass through them. All three of them and at one time four had seen almost all the Queens of Mewni come and go; Birth, crowning, marriage, children, and death. The commission had been through it all with the queens of Mewni. And now sitting here talking about them they realized there were quite a few of them they all missed.

"Nether." They both said simultaneously. "That just leaves Moon and we all know that Rhombulus's has a crush on her." Omnitraxus stated.

"Yeah, and Star's too young to matter." Hekapoo put in. "So I guess that means we're done." Finalized Rhombulus in a content manner.

Hekapoo did feel kind of satisfied with the answers she had gotten but the urge to probe further still surged. "Hey. What about some of the Queen's sisters? Like Hope, Pulsaria, and Minguanta. Did any of you have crushes on one of them?" She said, looking at the two.

A wave of exhaustion swept over the two male council members as Hekapoo's continued investigating.

"Oh, could you give it a rest, Hekapoo"… Omnitraxus said irritably. "We've spent more than an hour answering your stupid questions about whaere Rhombulus or I have ever had romantic, sexual, or school kid crush on the queens of Mewni and we don't want the next being interrogated about the siblings of the monarch's."

"Yeah…" Rhombulus picked up. "All we've done all night is talk about our skeletons in the closet, but what about your. Hekapoo?"

"Rhombulus is right. What about some of those alleged relationships thats rumored you have been a part of? You know the ones with the Kings of Mewni."

Hekapoo blushed at the accusation. "I don't know what you mean." She said, getting on the defensive.

Omnitraxus looked up with a raised eyebrow. "Oh, really. Will what about that thing you had with King Hawk Redbird. You know the Ladies man of the royal spouses."

Hekapoo blushed the same color as Febe the Red One. "I never had a thing for that tramp."

"What about Rowin Forest or Oliver Forest?" Rhombulus add to Omnitraxus's list. A flare of anger rushed through her at the constant implication of her being another woman. "I have now or ever had an affair with any king of Mewni or Boyfriend of the queen."

Omnitraxus and Rhombulus gave each other a look of semi disbelieves before looking back at their friend. "So it isn't true that you have a crush or a thing for the Diaz kid?" Rhombulus looked surprised. "You mean Star's boyfriend? But he's just a kid."

Sweat started to bead on Hekapoo's temples. She hadn't expected them to turn the conversation on her or know about her fancy for Marco. She had developed the hots for him when he was hunting down all her fire clones. But by then he was already a full grown man with stubble, a motorcycle, and a six pack. Not the beanie teen he was now.

Hekapoo was about to sat something back when. "Do you think that Venus's pubic hair was multicolored as wall?"

Everyone at the table looked down at Rhombulus's left snake hand, which was turning a brilliant shade of red. "I asked only out of academic curiosity about the Mewni biology." Spoke the mouthy appendage, trying to dissolve some of the mild discussed that his work mates felt at the moment.

Everyone stared for a moment longer before the vulgarity of the offense were off and everyone want back to stareing blankly at the liveliness in front of them. Just as the hearth in the pub had more logs added to it the bar-maid reappeared and Rhombulus awkwardly tried to stand up from the table to flag her down. As her head turned in their direction Hekapoo leaned close and in a much quieter tone said. "Ok if you most know I never had an affair with any of the kings of Mewni. Maybe a little crush but that was it, and as for Marco Diaz. He was a very different man when he was hunting me down in my dimension snuffing out my fire to earn his own dimensional scissors."

As the waitress made her way over Omnitraxus spoke. "Wall then if everyone has come clean…" the council member was suddenly cut off. "I haven't." Rhombulus's snake hands popped in. Three quick dirty looks were shot in their direction. "You two"… Rhombulus started. "I mean no offence but no one wants to know about the skeletons in your closets."

Rhombulus's snake hands looked big eyed at their friends for a moment before saying. "Yeah you're probably right."

Omnitraxus started specking again. "As I was saying, if everyone has come clean lots put this aside and focus on clearing our heads and quietly enjoying the rest of the night, because if today was bad I not ready to think about what tomorrow is going to like."

Everyone agreed and took a deep stress releasing breathes just as the bar-maid showed up to ask if they wanted refills on their drinks.

The End

 _Author's Note- I don't really remember vary wall when I got into Star. It was early last year some time before March when I started catching it on the Disney Channel. I was really enthused about the new live action version of Beauty and the Beast that was coming out in spring and spent much of the day trying to catch clips and behind the scenes sneak peeks on the Disney Channel and at the time in the early afternoon Star vs. the Forces of Evil came on. I really liked the opening theme, it was fun and energetic. I think I started binge watching it later that year because I wanted to watch something that was fun and lighthearted. Eventually my twin sister got into the series and become a huge fan of the villain Toffee and we both fallowed the series all the way up to the end of season three._

 _Anyway I based this story on "Butterfly Trap" where Rhombulus's under threat of death from the Truth or Punishment Cube blurted out that he has a crush on Queen Moon. I used inspiration for the Queen's of Mewni from the very talented artist Jgss0109 on Deviant Art. My sister found his work there, she's a member of the site. I hope everyone enjoyed this. Pleases level a review if you have anything you want to say._

 _I wrote this under the mind sat that the High Commission were all from different dimensions and over generations of interaction with the Mewni people formed the Magic High Commission with help of the Queens. I also wanted to put a scene in here were the bar-maid calls Omnitraxus "Prime" and when his friends ask why he says he likes it after hearing about a great called Opitmus Prime from the Tranformers franchise and thinks it makes him sound cooler._

 **Disclaimer-** I do not own this franchise or any of its characters as well as the fan characters they belong to the parson that created them.


End file.
